Transforming the 5 Big Areas of Your Life

Rebecca Kochenderfer


Have you ever heard of Self-Perception Theory?

Love Finances Health & Fitness Spirituality Creativity

The way to change your life is to change your identity.
The way to change your identity is through your actions.

You are watching you.

The picture you have in your head of who you are, influences who you become.

When you are life designing, you start with a goal…

I want to be fit
I want to be in a loving partnership
I want to be a good parent
I want to be an entrepreneur
I want to be good with money

Make these things your identity.

For example…

You have a better chance of managing your finances if your identity is,
“I’m good at finances. I’m good with money.â€

The way to have that special love in your life is to identify as,
“I am worthy of love. I’m good at giving and receiving love.â€

You have a better chance of being fit and healthy if your identity is,
“I’m an athlete.â€
“I’m a health conscious person.â€
“I’m whole foods plant based.â€

If spirituality, mindfulness, and faith are important to you, create an identity around it.
“I’m a devote Catholic/Mormon/Baptist.â€
“I’m a meditator.â€
“I’m a journaler.â€
“I’m a spiritual person.â€

If you want your own business, build an identity as, “I’m an entrepreneur.†Which is different than, “I
have my own business.â€

Can you feel the difference?
“This is what I do,†versus “This is who I am.â€

Q: How do you create the identity that you want?

A: Through your actions.

You are watching you. Self-Perception Theory says that…

When you see yourself getting up in the middle of the night again and again to comfort your child or
change a diaper, the witnessing part of you, the perceiver, sees the consistency. After seeing these
actions again and again, the doubts fade and a knowingness takes its place. You believe, “I am a good

When you see yourself take action again and again to choose healthy food, move your body, fill your
shopping cart with fruits and vegetables… Your identity becomes,
“I’m a healthy person.â€

When you see yourself tracking your finances, paying your bills on time, paying your taxes on time
without penalties, knowing how much you earn and how much you spend… You begin to believe,
because you see yourself taking congruent actions again and again. Your self-concept is,
“I’m good with money.â€

When you see yourself communicate your needs again and again — setting good boundaries, taking
care of yourself, using kind and loving words, encouraging yourself… It forms an identity of,
“I matter.â€
“I’m worth it.â€
“My life is important.â€
“I’m a loving person.â€

Identity can take time. Be patient with yourself. Set that goal, have that dream. Then take action again
and again. It doesn’t have to be big steps. You just have to see yourself being that kind of person again and again.

Identity is the key to lasting change. Identity is the key to transformation.

This is Rebecca Kochenderfer from…
sending you courage to dream, clarity to know, and energy to act.

    Rebecca Kochenderfer

    Founder of

    About Rebecca Kochenderfer

    Rebecca Kochenderfer is’s founder and host. She is the author of Joy Journal, an uplifting collection of journaling tips and techniques. Rebecca is honored to hold this space for the journaling community to connect, thrive, and grow. Fellow journalers can connect with Rebecca at or on Facebook and send her questions and stories about their own journaling experience. For press and advertising inquiries contact here.